INFJ Diary

Conversing with a stranger

I was in college when I learned how to crack a conversation with a stranger. I deliberately practised it, which at the time, required lots of guts from me, until I became comfortable with it. It was nice. I still do it to this day. I get to know people even if I only meet them once. And since I’m not good in doing small talks, I have a tendency to drive the conversation to deeper things. Our little chitchat would verge on their life plans, on their present stresses, or anything they wanted to talk about.

But I still remember one time when I tried to talk to someone who was like isang tanong, isang sagot. I have asked a couple of questions and she just answered curtly. So I dropped the convo and just remained silent. That was new to me and I didn’t know what to make of it. Was she shy? Not in the mood? I didn’t know. But reading from a forum thread about introverts, I learned that there are ‘some’ introverts who preferred to be left alone, they don’t want any stranger to talk with them. (I said ‘some’ because not all introverts are like that, and I’m an introvert myself). Because of this, I started getting uncomfortable in initiating a conversation with someone I don’t know. So this little hobby of mine got a bit restrained. When I’m about to talk to someone, doubts automatically flash in my head. Will she be uncomfortable if I talk to her? Does she prefer to be left alone? Thus, I end up shutting my mouth. But even so, I still do this activity of mine from time to time.

And then just today while I was waiting in Yesha’s gymnatics class, I decided to strike a convo with another mom sitting beside me. I was bored and having a little chitchat would do me good. Yet, just like with my previous experience, she was also like isang tanong isang sagot. She was not reciprocating. Thank goodness this does not always happen. So getting her cues, I dropped my intention. Maybe she’s one of those people who doesn’t want to be bothered with a conversation.

Now I learned that if someone is interested to chitchat with me, they will reciprocate my questions or will show interest. And if they are just being curt, it’s a sign that they’re not interested or not socially comfortable.

If you ask me what am I getting out of this, well, I don’t know too… hehe… but I believe that every person has a story to tell, every person is worth getting to know with. And in every story that I get to listen to is like going to an adventure.

So, on to the next convo with a stranger!

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